I’ve had a lot on my mind of late (when do I not?). It seems never ending; the continual cycle of things to do, remember, etc, etc. No wonder i’m mentally drained a lot!

I’d recently attended an appointment with my university’s mental health worker (who is a fabulous lady), told her all about the four weeks we’d not seen one another over xmas and after furiously scribbling down notes, gave me a mused expression. “You’re the busiest person I know AND you have a mental health condition. How have you not exploded?”

I unfortunately go through my life feeling somewhat unproductive, never really achieving anything, yet in reality - she’s right.

I’m at uni sudying a science course, i’m trying to run a society and i’m a club photographer on weekends. Financially atm i’m crippled, I’ve just moved house and my diet could do with some work as most days i’m just about eating two meals worth a day. Not forgetting to mention that depression causes my concentration and focus to be somewhat shot.

I am busy. I AM BUSY, but I always feel like i’m lazy, unproductive, unreliable, reaching for the unobtainable and barely flying by the seat of my pants.

I’ve come to realise i’m spreading myself too thinly. I’m not superwoman. I need a workload where I can achieve goals, not weigh myself down to the point of despair. I AM NOT LAZY.

Herein lies another bee in my bonnet: My lack of money linked in with lack of job/lazyness…

I mentioned my concentration span before. It doesn’t stop me from getting a job, but it does detract from my ability to complete my uni work on time or to a high standard that i’m capable of. I’d tried to explain this to a good friend when they were advising me to get a job and couldn’t quite comprehend it.

I suppose I should give up the photography and get a weekend job (if in the current climate that is possible), but the reason i’m reluctant to is because it’s one of the only things that gets me out of the house. I enjoy taking photos and I have the opportunity to socialise with people, bringing me out of my social anxiety that was once terribly crippling. I spent the good part of a year barely leaving my flat, so anything that halts this behaviour, i’m glad of.

I guess one reason i’ve not exploded is because i’m on medication. In all honesty, without it I think I would have had a nervous breakdown before now. Another being that I’ve learnt to talk about it, not hide and feel shunned by the stigma. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I suffer from a mental health disorder. Like any other illness, why can’t I talk about it? It doesn’t mean I’m wrong in some way. I just need help to get back on track, on my own feet again.

The best realisation out of all of this shit though? Without the support of my friends and my mother, I probably would not be where I am right now.

This is, quite frankly comedy gold.

Boys, you better take notes, as it is not the way to bag yourself a woman. Let alone “nail her”.

Bet you can’t read it without pissing yourself laughing. Girls - try not to dry out at the thought….

“It’s a cold blustery night and we’ve arranged to meet secretly. There’s a country park not far from my house. I told you to meet me near to the centre monument. You know that we wont have much time so You’re dressed ready for me to take advantage of you. You have boots on, stockings attached to a basque and a little g-sting to offer some cover for your hungry little pussy. Wrapping your red coat around yourself, you tie the waist nice and tight. You catch a glance of yourself in the mirror, you know you look hot. You’re already beginning to feel your pussy tingling.

Locking the front door behind yourself, you enter the lonely streets, a few cars pass, You can feel the drivers checking your legs out, little do they know how little you have on beneath your red mac. You’re surprised just how wet and horny you’re feeling as you enter the park through the large iron gates. The trees rustle as you walk deeper into the dark. You know this place so well during the day, but it feels so different tonight.

Your phone buzzes ‘I can see you, keep walking!’ the text reads, You follow my instruction. Hearing footsteps approaching behind, getting closer. You’re feeling a little scared now, not sure what I’ve got myself into. Suddenly you feel arms wrap around you, pulling you to the edge of the path. You’re pushed over the back of a bench, your hands cuffed quickly together. You can’t move, your ass stuck out in the cold open air.

Smack!! You feel the sting across your ass as someone spanks you hard. Your mind is racing, wondering if it is me. Your g-string is pulled down violently, exposing your naked pussy. Suddenly you feel the wetness of a tongue begin to explore your tender pussy, splitting you open, your juices begin to run. You love having your pussy licked from behind. Whoever this is sure knows what they are doing, as their tongue sinks deeper into the folds of your pussy. Your legs tremble as you near your first orgasm. You whimper out as the waves of pleasure begin to flood through every curve of your smooth body.

‘Oh god, I need some cock!’ You yelp out. That’s when my cock slaps you across the face. Your mouth opens as you swallow down this huge cock in front of you. Its nearly too big for you to get your mouth around. You do your best but You’re never going to be able to take it all in. Your hand reaches under and squeezes my heavy balls tight. ‘Please I need to be fucked, please fuck me!!’ i plead. With that I take my huge wet cock from your mouth.

You feel my huge tip resting against the lips of your pussy. Slowly I push harder, your lips open to allow my throbbing cock to enter you. I feel so big, but my length keeps coming and coming. You’re nearly passing out with the pleasure this is bringing you. It begins to get too tight, I pull back, coating my lovely thick cock with your juices. Bringing myself nearly all the way out again. Then i begin a long powerful thrust to your womb again. With my cock being lubricated by your sopping pussy i press further. You feel my cock nudging against your cervix. You feel so full as my strong hands hold your slim waist tightly. I begin to thrust back and forth with more vigor. Your mind can’t concentrate as this monster cock fills you to the brink with each hard thrust. My heavy balls swinging under hitting your little clit. All You can do is whimper out as each thrust gives you a mini orgasm. Harder I fuck you, The easier it is for you to take my huge length. ‘Oh Yes!!!’ You scream out as your legs buckle. You body supported by the park bench as I nail you harder.”